“I like escalators because an escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You’ll never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience. We apologize that you can still get up there.” - Mitch Hedberg
I thought about this quote today when I got off the metro. The escalators at Crystal City have been down the past couple days, and I just don’t understand why people stand there so confused. This morning, I don’t know who they were but they looked back at the closed escalator and then back at the one that was stopped - rather…converted into stairs - and looked so damned confused.
People! It’s just freakin’ stairs! We walk up them! We hold the railing and haul ass up. How is this so confusing and/or difficult? I don’t get it. I mean I like hauling ass up the stairs as much as the next person but when it’s the only option? Suck it up yo. People have got to get to work!
It’s even worse when it’s not a bunch of annoyed commuters but rather a herd of tourists who have no clue where they’re going and act as if they don’t know that a broken escalator is not really broken…it’s just been turned into stairs. You hear that tourists, confused commuters and teenagers who can’t be bothered…put one foot in front of the other and MOVE YOUR BUM!
I was running especially late this morning because of delays courtesy of the Yellow Line, so I was a little peeved when people stopped in the middle of the platform looking confusedly at the escalator.
In other news, despite my NCAA bracket SUCKING majorly this year (last year I won in my facebook group pool i was in…this year? I came out with 120 points thanks to hearing somewhere back when it was selection sunday that Kansas was the favorite. They sure were! Woo! I still picked the champion. Which makes…three years in a row. I. Rule. Yes yes…I just rule.
The best part? I don’t even LIKE college basketball. NU never had a great team, I was always more of a hockey fan than basketball so I never cared. But I’ve always filled out a bracket, picking teams based on petty things like BYU v. Texas? Mormons? Or Texans? The lesser of the two evils? I picked the Mormons. They let me down. If it’s a northern school v. a southern school? You betcha I’ll always pick the Northern school. This isn’t always the most effective way of picking but hey…I still came out on top. So boo-mother effin’-ya.
Anyhow, time to get things done.
Tomorrow? My 26 before 26 list. It’s going to be a good one!
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