There is something to be said of shopping under the influence.

Julie posted an article the other day about BUI - specifically targeted at internet shopping. Well I’ve got a tale to tell you about shopping under the influence and then riding the damn metro.

It started when my coworker/boss and i decided walking into pentagon city - she was planning on going to DSW and I was planning on going to buy a new dress for gold cup, that “hey lets get a drink first and then go our separate ways.”

A drink? Turned into two bottles of wine.

Shit.

So I didn’t find a dress but I did find a pair of yellow pants at the gap that I had been swooning over since before my birthday that were on sale. And a cute white top at abercrombie and fitch for next weekend. Anyone who knows me knows my obsession of white tops.

So then, I needed to get a couple of things at target. I could have gone to CVS. Boyfriend TRIED To get me to just go to CVS .. “I really think it’s going to be closed lovey, why don’t you just come home?”

But I can catch the yellow line. and it goes right up there!

Indeed it does. And target? Totally just closed.

Eff me man. Eff me.

So i grabbed a slice of pizza at the new pizza place right next to Target. And I ate and I read and I tracked the time of the next train that I needed to get. It was a yellow train…i think. Maybe it was green. I don’t really remember. After sharing two bottles of wine with a coworker because they were half price? You kind of forget the details. Anyhow!

I get off to switch because if it was green which it may actually have been…i decided I didn’t want to walk through shady SE from M street to our street which isn’t HORRIBLE but…it isn’t that great and it’s horribly lit.

SO i get onto a blue (maybe orange?) after like an eight minute wait. I get onto the train only to realize FUCK. I don;t have my bag!!! FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!

who does that??

Me. Drunk. That’s fucking who.

So i get off at Federal Center SW only to jump back onto a train because Maybe i left it on the platform? There was 3 minutes till the next train going in the opposite direction, so i could go back to check. But what if i left it on a green line train? Crap. I’m never going to get them back. It’s amazing how LITTLE metro workers care when you approach them probably reeking of wine sobbing over a pair of yellow pants and a top from abercrombie - i had at least 8 minutes till the next train going back to eastern market. so after realizing that metro workers didn’t give a crap and after realizing that i probably wasn’t going to get my pants and top back…I hopped on a green line train because well…it was there and i didn’t want to wait.

CVS was closed. I had pissed away $60 because i couldn’t keep track of my crap. But at the very least? The one thing that can make me feel better was it was the governments bling thrown at me to stimulate the economy. And stimulate the economy i did except it was kind of like….hooking up with a guy and having him just up and leave after you go down on him leaving you hanging and longing for more.

I just got hosed man. I just got hosed by myself. *sigh*

For now? It’s off to the races. Tally-ho bias! I’m off to pretend I have even the slightest bit of southern charm…now what the hell did i do with my pearls…